The Beast in Philly
Originally posted at Jinx's place
I will start this thread by proclaiming that I have nothing against black people, they are often amusing and I believe they deserve the right to vote. That being said, let's be Frank for a minute. I get on the bus to go to the gym today in Philly and I grabbed a seat in the front on the bus. This black man comes in and right away I could tell he smelled like ass. He was scrawny and unbathed looking. He was wearing those annoying glasses with the real thick gold arms. He had some weird jeans on, and on the back pocket three fake plastic 100 dollar bills were hanging out of the back pocket and the bills were stitched into the jeans. He comes on the bus and attempts to sit next to me. I say, "This seats taken, brother, but there are some seats open for you in the back of the bus." He says, "What da fuck is dat suppose to mean, mutha fucker?!!" I say, "It means I don't want your smelly ass sitting next to me, now beat it!" He starts yelling at me right in the middle of the bus, "I ain't the one, don't play me, etc etc." I jumped out of seat and hit him with a quick uppercut that nearly lifted him out of his Timberlands. He hit the floor of the bus and he wasn't getting up to cause any more problems. By now the white bus driver was staring at me and so were many of the colored people riding the bus. I went up to the biggest black guy on the bus and said, "What's up pussy, why the fuck you staring at me?" He said, "Relax mustard, I ain't got no problem with you." I sat back down and rode the bus up broad street to my gym. As I was getting off I looked the white bus driver in the eye, winked at him, and I said, "You liked that shit didn't you?" He said, "Yeah, I did."